altitude: 0m and sinking

When the viajita died, her children commenced to cry a flood of tears, inundating the only bridge out of town, leaving them isolated in their mourning, from the velorio to the funeral 9 days later. It was like something out of a Gabriel Garcia Marquez novel. I wish I had so eloquent a way to describe having 9 days of explosive diarrhea while the latrine’s flooded.

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Imitating a miniature tiguere, a toddler known affectionately by all as El Chiquito takes his uncle’s pistola (not loaded at the time) and stuffs it down his pants. 2 minutes later he soils himself.

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After watching his Tigueres de Licey win the serie final, Ullo runs outside and fires his pistola into the air. All the wannabe tigueres go cruizing down the mud trench of a main drag, revving their motorcycle engines. Up in Nueva Yoi we call our national pelota championship the World Series.

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A year or two back, Noel got a micro enterprise loan to start a small motorcycle repair shop, which he runs from his mother’s veranda. As in any self-respecting mechanic shop, there’s a calendar with the image of a topless blonde prominently displayed.

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10-year-old Nungito likes to walk around the yard, sucking his thumb, wearing nothing more than plastic chancletas, tighty-whiteys, and a XX-large t-shirt reading, “FBI: Female Body Inspector”.

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Guillermo asks me to translate an English phrase on his grandson’s school bag. It reads “Raytheon Benefit Center”.

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The biggest hit in the campo now is the bachata ballad “Algo Grande” by Anthony Santos. The second biggest hit is an “1812 Overture” ringtone that the kids play incessantly on any cell phone they can get their hands on.

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In San Jose de Ocoa, the barbershop, Peluqueria el Flow is adorned with a portrait of Che Guevara – the classic picture with the locks flowing down from the iconic beret. Precariously close to the locks are hair clippers.

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At a conference at a Catholic retreat center, I present a report on the state of affairs in my campo. At the opposite end of the room is a large portrait of Monseñor Romero.

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Altitude, ahora mismo en la capitai: 0m and sinking (i.e. everything's flooded and the road back to my site is impassable).